Innocent Little Angel

I've been following the story of 10 year old Jetseta Gage since she went missing on March 24th of 2005 and one day later her body was found in an abandoned mobile home near Cedar Rapids. Roger Bentley was arrested for her abduction, rape and murder. He has been standing trial in Davenport this week. I read the testimony of what he did to this innocent little angel and it just breaks my heart. That poor little girl. I can't even imagine the terror and pain she went through the last hours of her life. Roger Bentley deserves more than a life sentence in prison. He deserves to be tortured for the rest of his life. What a sick bastard!!! He and his brother, who also molested this little girl, ripped her innocents away forever. And then because of some sick twisted perversion Roger Bentley took her away from her home, raped and murdered her. The thing that makes me even more sick is the fact that Jetseta's mother dated James Bentley, Roger's brother, after knowing the man was a sex offender. She let these two men into her home around her daughter after knowing these two men preyed upon little girls. And when they show Jetseta's mother crying it enrages me. I realize she is sad that her daughter was taken away from her so brutally but she should have considered the consequences of letting known sex offenders into her life. What I don't understand is why women let such scum into their lives just so they can have some love. Don't the needs of your child come first?? That is why you have children. To love them, provide for them and make their lives rich and help them grow. Not bring some sick fucking perverts into your home with the chance that they might molest your daughter. Ok...I'm done ranting. It just sickons me to no end and my heart breaks for this little girl. Next week Jetseta will finally be able to rest in peace when her rapist and murderer goes to prison for the rest of his life. May this little angel be in heaven with the other little angels where no one can hurt them ever again.

Camaro

My junior year of high school my dad bought me a 1980 Chevy Camaro. I was so proud of that car. I would make up things that I had to go and do just so I could drive it. On Friday and Saturday nights I'd be on University Avenue in Cedar Falls, IA driving back and forth. There was a route that everyone would drive. Down Uni into Waterloo...drive through the Hardee's parking lot and back up Uni to Black Hawk Village. Back and forth all night long, checking out boys with my girlfriends, parking and talking to boys with my girlfriends, racing boys in their cars with my girlfriends. It was a blast!! The reason I started thinking about my Camaro wasn't because I'm going through a crisis and missing my youth...ha ha...but because the other day, on my way to work, there was a girl driving next to me going to Johnston High School. She was driving a 90's Camaro and I thought that was so cool. Made me wonder if she takes it downtown to Grand Ave with her girlfriends and made me wonder if they have the same kind of fun that my girlfriends and I used to have "Cruising the Strip"! I hope that she does because that is one tradition that I hope never dies. "Cruising Uni" was so much fun. Oh and that missing my youth comment...sometimes I do miss the things that were fun back then. But really the things that I'm doing now are just as great!

Listening to Old Records

Tonight we pulled out the old records and turntable. They sounded so good. Made me miss the old days a little. Boston, Fleetwood Mac, Led Zepplin, G & R and even Moon Unit Zappa singing Valley Girl. It was great. It made me appreciate music again. Lately I've been listening to Country because there just hasn't been any really good new Rock and Roll bands. It will be a sad day when Bon Jovi, Aerosmith, Van Halen, Kiss and the Stones pass on. There just isn't any music like that being made today. We have Kanye West, Eminem, Diddy, and the Strokes now. That music may sound good to the youth but it's just not what I call good. Yes, I'll admit I'm getting older and I'm probably a little stuck in the good old days. When I do listen to music other than Country I'm drawn to Tracey Bonham, Cowboy Junkies, Melissa Ferrick and Ani DiFranco. They actually know how to write a song and the lyrics actually say something. It's funny because I still find myself calling a groups new CD their new record. I bet most of the kids growing up now have never even listened to a record especially since you can download anything you want into your IPod. It's incredible how things progress. Soon record stores will be a distant memory and I'm sure eventually CDs will no longer exist.

No Problem

I've decided to accept the fact that Generation Y says "No Problem" instead of "You're welcome". It used to bug me and I felt it was rude but I've come to realize they actually are saying "You're welcome" in their own way.

Two more what the F*%k moments

First what the F moment was New Years Day. We went to Daytona's with a couple we are friends with. On the way there I spotted the usual panhandlers on the corner of Merle Hay and I 80. So we are having lunch and talking at Daytona's. I start watching this guy playing the lottery slot machine games...I'm like...that is one of the panhandlers that was standing on the corner of Merle Hay and I 80 begging for money. WHAT THE F???? Yet another reason why you shouldn't give those fools money!!

Second what the F moment. I was driving home the other day and I pulled up next to this car. In the passenger seat was a woman holding a 2 or 3 yr old child in her lap. Where is a police officer when you need one? Isn't that illegal...um...YES!!! Get a car seat.

People seriously blow my mind daily. WOW!

Sex and the City Junkie

I'm officially a Sex and the City Junkie. I received the 6 season box set for Christmas and I can't stop watching it even though I've already seen every episode. Pathetic yes...but you know what?? I don't care! :)

Happy New Year

Happy New Year! It's a beautiful day here in Des Moines, IA. Wish that we didn't need to have new brakes put on the Harley because we'd be out on it today! Our party last night was so much fun. Lots of food and plenty of libation! I'm so thankful that I have such a great group of friends and that my sister and her husband could join us to.

I'm not big into resolutions but I'm going to make a few. I need to get in shape and drop some pounds and this is the year that I'm going to do that and stick to it. This is also the year that I'm going to do the things that I keep saying that I'm going to do. I've been wanting to take pictures of roadside memorials and do research on who the people were. I'm going to do that this year. I'm going to try and do a documentary on bikers in Des Moines. Hopefully I can find bikers that want to tell their stories on why they love to ride and any interesting rides they have been on, rally experiences, etc. I'm also going to do more art work. I love being creative and I just need to let it flow.

Wishing everyone a very Happy, Healthy and Successful New Year! Happy 2006!!

Merry Christmas

Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas! I'm at my parent's tonight in Denver, IA. I think Christmas changes for you when you get older. For me it's not about the presents anymore. I really don't need anything, I buy everything that I really want already. To me it's about spending time with my family. That's the best gift of all. I would have to say the most memorable Christmas for me was the year that I told my sister that Santa was really Mom and Dad. I felt bad for making her cry. That was also the year that her and I got our play kitchen. That was the best gift ever and we played with it for hours...actually years. Another Christmas we got Shaun Cassidy amps with microphones. Wow that was cool. My dad just recently tried to sell them on E-Bay but no one must remember Shaun Cassidy because they didn't get any bids. Poor Shaun!

Well...ho ho ho to you. May Santa bring you everything that you wish for tonight while you are sleeping tight. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.

Pan Handlers

Driving down Merle Hay Road to the mall I see the pan handlers standing at the I-80 off ramp. It's about 12 degrees out and the thought comes into my head...Why would someone stand out in the freezing cold like this. How come they are so dedicated to standing here day in and day out? I seriously just don't get it. Wouldn't it be more enjoyable to get a job? Maybe they don't because they are mentally ill or have a drug problem but I still just don't get it. Maybe someday I should stop and ask since it baffles my mind everytime I drive by and see them standing there. Maybe it's because they make a lot of money standing on the corner begging for change or a couple dollars here and there. I still just don't get it. I used to feel bad and think I should give them something until a few years ago. I had some pop cans in my car and figured I'd give them to the homeless man that stood on the corner every day on my way home from work. I rolled down my window and handed them to him. I figured he would take them over to the grocery store and redeem them for change. I felt good about helping him out. The next day on my way home at the corner where he usually stood were those pop cans lying in the median. That was the last time that I ever felt sad for the pan handlers and the last time I tried to help them that way. I do have to say there is one pan handler that always makes me laugh. He holds a sign that says I'm being honest here, I just need a beer. I have to give him credit, at least he's telling everyone the truth. He's owned up to the fact that he's possibly an alcoholic and he just needs a drink. I'm sure there will be some people that read my blog that think I'm totally heartless and that I should help the less fortunate and guess what I do. I donated money to Hurricane Katrina, I serve meals at the Youth Homeless shelter, I put money in the Salvation Army kettles, I buy less fortunate children presents at Christmas, I have tutored children to help them with their reading skills...the list is endless. I do have a heart and I do help those in need but I do not feel sorry for driving by the pan handlers begging for change. That is their choice on how they are going to make their way in the world. I chose to work and I work very hard and no one is giving me any handouts because I guess I just don't need them.

Support Our Troops

Another Iowa soldier dies in Iraq. Spc. Gregory Tull died November 25th, 2005. He was 20 years old. I did not know Spc. Tull but my heart still aches. The hope I have is that all of the deaths of our soldiers are not in vain. The hope I have is that what they are doing in Iraq is helping.

God Bless Our U.S. Troops and their families who sacrifice so much for our freedom and the freedom of others.

Oh Christmas Tree

Ok...what is going on with this whole Christmas tradition bashing stuff that I've been hearing on TV and reading in the papers? Seriously, if I want to call my tree a "Christmas" tree that's what I'm going to call it. Sorry if I offend but that is what it has always been to me and I'm not changing tradition because groups of people are offended by the word "Christmas". What has happened to our traditions. They are disappearing right and left just because we have to be so politically correct. I'm done! What is this world coming to? It's falling apart. Someone please explain all of this madness to me and quick. I realize not everyone celebrates Christmas but just because not everyone does why do the people who do have to change? I don't expect people to change their traditions with Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Ramadan, etc.... I'm not asking people to change the name of the Menorah, Dreidel, the Kinara, Mkeka, Mazao, Kikombe cha umoja, Mishumaa saba, or the Zawadi so why is everyone so up in arms about the "Christmas" tree?? I just think there are more constructive things to be worrying about than if people want to call their tree a Christmas tree!! We need to be thinking about homeless children, the troops, our families....

Ok...I got that off my chest...I'm going to go put up my Christmas Tree now.(next someone will want to ban the colors red and green during the holidays...just you wait!) I hope you all have a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Joyful Kwanzaa or just a plain old Happy Holiday!

Happy Thanksgiving

I hope that you and your family had a wonderful Thanksgiving. Each of us has so many things to be thankful for.

Jane 360

Tonight I attended an art show called Jane 360. An eclectic group of female artists joined together to show their work to the art enthusiasts of Des Moines. The inaugural exhibit, See Jane Make Art, was held in the former Northwestern Hotel, located in the East Village. There was a wide range of creations including photography, printmaking, paintings, and mixed media. It was great to see a show made up of only female artists. The paintings of Larassa Kabel and Steph Van Dorn were out of this world. Both of these women have such extreme talent. If I had 1/10 of their talent I would be happy. I could stand and look at their pieces for hours. Kathy Tran's mixed media pieces also excited me. My favorite piece was Madonna and Cat, carved out of wood and then painted, this cartoonistic piece made me smile. The piece that really blew me away though was by Brooke Howard. On the front of an old medicine cabinet was a self portrait of Brooke wrapped in a white sheet, standing in an old porcelain tub, looking out the window. When you opened the door to the cabinet there was a shrine of all kinds of wonderful finds...Religious figures, skulls, poems, pictures of family members...it was amazing. I look forward to their next show and I hope that this adds fire to the art scene in Des Moines. Art is so important and we need to embrace all of this talent and support it. Kudos to Jane 360 for doing an all female show and sharing their amazing talent with Des Moines.

Ode to the Old Dirty Biker

Whenever I'm at bike night I always catch myself watching the Old Dirty Bikers. Their worn look draws me in. I'm always wondering what their story is. What kinds of experiences they've had riding the highways on their bikes. Most of them don't ride the fancy, shiny Harley Davidson...most of their bikes have character, the bike is as worn as it's rider. I went to the National Motorcycle Museum in Anamosa, IA on Friday and there was the coolest looking worn out Harley there. I stood their for a long time looking at it, wondering what the rider must have looked like. How many miles this old biker and his bike must have ridden. There was even a Christmas ornament on it. At the museum there was also the Hall of Fame room. There was a Hall of Famer who has since passed on to the other side whose story drew me in. His name was Allen Calvin La Fortune. A Harley was the only form of transportation that Allen ever owned. He used his bike to haul his boat, a camper, and a trailer. He had rode a million miles by 1998. Allen's last ride was 6 days before his death in August 2002. Allen was a true 1%er. Some people just don't get motorcycles and what it is like to ride but I know the Old Dirty Bikers do. If you are a true 1%er and you read my blog, leave me a story. I'd love to hear about your adventures on the open road.

Here is a poem that I found written by an Old Dirty Biker, I really liked it and hopefully you will too:

As the southern sun makes its fall, the darkness of night starts to call.
Sweat beads thick around his head, a mind full of heartache, a heart full of dread needing something to unscramble lifes tangled web.
Out in the darkness a steel horse sits, poised and ready to calm lifes fits.
A touch of a button, a twist of a grip
breaking the silence 88 inches rip, slicing the night with one eye lit.
As cold wind blows and the white lines roll from his head lifes troubles seem to flow and for a brief moment it's touched his soul.
As the western moon makes its fall the steel horse sits back in its stall.
Live to ride, ride to live as one may recall but for those who do
they know this is all.

Really Bad Movie

Really bad movies suck you in and keep you watching them thinking that it has to get better at some point. I watched probably the worst movie I've ever seen tonight. It was called Dance with Me with Jennifer Beals and Campbell Scott. While there were some semi erotic dance scenes in the movie, I just kept asking myself why I was wasting time on this flick. But I did and I'm here to tell you not to waste your time unless you have time to waste. It was probably as bad, if not worse than Eyes Wide Shut.

Another Birthday...Argh!

Wow...these birthdays roll around faster as you get older. I remember being 13 wishing I was 16 and then I was 16 wishing I was 21. Now I'm turning 37 and I'm wishing I was like 25. I loved 25. It was a great age. Really I'm not too depressed about 37. I'm still 3 yrs away from 40 and I feel like I just continue to get better with age. I'm like a fine wine...he he! I think when you hit your 30's you are finally growing up...finally becoming the person you are going to be for the rest of your life. Being a 20 something for me was chaotic. It was quite a learning experience for me. You think you know it all in your 20's. Now that I'm at the end of my 30's, I know I don't know it all and there is so much more out there that I need to do before life passes me by. Live like there is no tomorrow and laugh as much as you can. Life is what you make it and I'm not going to let 37 get me down. I'm going to live like I'm still 25 and have a damn good time doing it! Happy Birthday to me!

The Poppy

Today I went to the grocery store and the VFW(Veterans of Foreign Wars) members were selling poppies. I purchased a couple like I always do because of my respect for them serving our country. As I walked around the store I thought to myself...I need to actually thank those men when I leave the store. I wrote about thanking them on my blog and I just need to do it...need to tell them Thank You! I walked out of the store and the Vet that I had purchased my poppies from was sitting alone...I'd say he was about 75 to 80...I put my hand on his shoulder and said...Sir, I would just like to say thank you for the service you gave to our country. I appreciate what you did very much. He looked at me, smiled and said...you are welcome. I think it made him feel good, at least I hope it did. I know it made me feel good for saying it.

Thank You for Your Sacrifice

November 11th is Veterans' Day. No matter what you feel about the war going on now in the Middle East or the wars of the past, we need to thank our Veterans and our troops serving now, for the sacrifices they have made for us. We are the luckiest people in the world! We can live where we want to live, have our own religious beliefs, buy whatever we want to buy, Vote, get an education...the list is endless. Can you seriously imagine what it is like to live in terror every day of your life that you may die because of a suicide car bomber or because of your religious or political beliefs? I don't think you can. We are spoiled and lucky as Hell that we are able to live in this country. I thank God everyday that I was born here and that I am so lucky to live the American Dream! And I also thank God everyday that we have Men and Women who sacrifice so that I can live this life by keeping the USA safe! The Toby Keith song American Soldier touches my heart everytime I hear it......

"American Soldier"

I'm just trying to be a father,

Raise a daughter and a son,

Be a lover to their mother,

Everything to everyone.

Up and at 'em bright and early,

I'm all business in my suit,

Yeah, I'm dressed for success from my head down to my boots,

I don't do it for money, there's still bills that I can't pay,

I don't do it for the glory, I just do it anyway,

Providing for our future's my responsibility,

Yeah I'm real good under pressure, being all that I can be,

And I can't call in sick on Mondays when the weekends been to strong,

I just work straight through the holidays,

And sometimes all night long.

You can bet that I stand ready when the wolf growls at the door,

Hey, I'm solid, hey I'm steady, hey I'm true down to the core,

And I will always do my duty, no matter what the price,

I've counted up the cost, I know the sacrifice,

Oh, and I don't want to die for you,

But if dyin's asked of me,

I'll bear that cross with an honor,

'Cause freedom don't come free.

I'm an american soldier, an american,

Beside my brothers and my sisters I will proudly take a stand,

When liberty's in jeopardy I will always do what's right,

I'm out here on the front lines, sleep in peace tonight.

American soldier, I'm an American,

An American,

An American Soldier

Thank you to all of our Veterans, Past and Present. Thank you to our troops serving now, here in the United States and all over this world! Thank you for the sacrifice that you make so that I can do whatever I want to do each and every day of my life. God Bless the USA and God Bless Our Service Men and Women!

What should I do with myself?

There is a song in the movie Crazy/Beautiful that fits me so well. The chorus goes like this:

It shouldn't hurt me to be free
It's what I really need to pull myself together
But if it's so good being free
Would you mind telling me
Why I don't know what to do with myself

I'm coming up on my 37th birthday in November and for the life of me I don't know what I'm going to do with the next 37 years. It has to be more than I've done. I need to hurry up and do the things I keep say that I'm going to or I'm going to be staring down 74 and saying to myself why didn't I do that when I was younger?

What I want to do:

Film a documentary
Sky Dive
Fly in a Fighter Jet
Ride across the USA on a Harley
Build a Habitat for Humanity Home
Go to a NFL game
Get a tattoo
Travel overseas to Italy
Go to Daytona Bike Week
Build a motorcycle
Visit Washington State and San Francisco

I better get busy!

Black and White - Foggy

Black and White - Foggy, never colorful and clear.

Strange but real dreams of old boyfriends, old friends, people currently in my life.

All jumbled together in my mind.

Sometimes I wake with tears, other times I wake with wonder;

especially when I dream of someone I have no real interest in but mysteriously shows up there.

Dreams of Harleys, romance, sex, famous people.

Dreams of being a child and laughing.

Dreams of lost loved ones who come to me with advice or to tell me they are watching over me.

Being chased by dogs, being kissed by a tall dark stranger.

So many dreams all in Black and White - Foggy.